Glow

Ever feel like you're on top of the world?  Like a cold winter is finally melting and the world around you is warming up?  The green tips of grass is reaching through the snow and the sun hits the dew in the trees.  Crystals everywhere and you're in a glitter wonderland.

Sometimes you need to throw someone in a water and let them to figure out how to swim (actually.. never do that.. cause someone could very potentially drown).

I've been here for about three weeks and it has been amazing to live life in a city.  I've always been intimidated by cities, by nightlife, by the crowds of people, by crime, and whatnot.  But I felt suffocating in super suburban in Michigan and there wasn't much to expand in East Lansing.

I guess you tend to contemplate life more after a death.  The typical questions "Am I happy with my life?  What am I doing? Is this really what I want to do?"  After Erica, I really thought about those things and slowly I realized there was some things in my life I was not happy with.  I took decisions, sometimes right and sometimes wrong, to be on the path I want to be on.  I still felt a little incomplete.  Ironically, it's that time of year again.  I can't believe it has been two years.  It does not feel that long and I don't think I could ever whole heartedly accept the fact that it's been two years without her... it makes me uneasy.

I'm not saying NOLA has changed me completely or I'm this whole new person, but I'm starting to remember the things I do really love and missed.  Laughter, adventure, living life to the fullest.

It's like a match, once you get a little fire going, it's hard to stop it from blazing*

And I hope this has been the little strike I needed.  I still got two more months here and I'm hoping each week gets better than the last.  

Toodles.

*This post in no way, shape, or form encourages arson